Joe Isaac Sasson On Becoming Free From The Fear Of Failure
An Interview With Savio P. Clemente
Savio P. ClementeFollow
8 min read
Let the thoughts happen. You’re not going to stop the mind from thinking, but you can quiet it. Don’t judge the thoughts. Instead of pushing them away, ask what part of you that thought is coming from. This is a technique that can take time to get better at. Most of the time I come across an inner child that needs or wants something. Validating and acknowledging the fear can be very freeing because then your mind understands that you are not ignoring it and it may quiet down.
The Fear of Failure is one of the most common restraints that holds people back from pursuing great ideas. Imagine if we could become totally free from the fear of failure. Imagine what we could then manifest and create. In this interview series, we are talking to leaders who can share stories and insights from their experience about “Becoming Free From the Fear of Failure.” As a part of this series, I had the distinct pleasure of interviewing Joe Isaac Sasson.
Joe has a bachelor’s degree in television and film and a master’s in social work. He is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and has worked in Pre-school and elementary schools helping children. Planet W Book I: The Secret in the Basement Laboratory is his first book.
Thank you so much for joining us! Our readers would love to “get to know you” a bit better. Can you tell us a bit about your ‘backstory’?
Sure, I’m a licensed psychotherapist in San Diego, CA. I wanted to write a science fiction/fantasy story for children that didn’t talk down to them. That is told to them in a fun, absurd way, while respecting their intelligence. So I started typing away, and boy oh boy was it scary thinking that I could do this.
Can you share with us the most interesting story from your career? Can you tell us what lessons or ‘take aways’ you learned from that?
The story I want to share is that no one is really better than you are. I really think what separates people who are successful from those who are still doubting themselves is fear. I found the way to neutralize fear was to just keep going. The more I listened to the “experts” the more I realized all they really had on me was experience. Time that they put in. Being committed to a goal. That’s it.
You are a successful leader. Which three character traits do you think were most instrumental to your success? Can you please share a story or example for each?
Empathy: I had my book shredded by a literary expert. I mean it felt like they found everything was wrong with it. I didn’t want to get out of bed for a whole day. Luckily it was a Sunday and I didn’t have to work. But I did go to this chalkboard I have in my kitchen and I wrote, “I still love you” to myself. That was a really nice thing I did for myself. No matter how bad the book was going to be, I still had to let those parts of myself that were hurting know that they were loved. And by the way, the book, Planet W Book I, really wasn’t very good back when that expert read it. It’s really good now though.
Perseverance: I made so many mistakes (and still do). I was ignorant about the writing process. “What is a preposition again?” “How do I not write in a passive voice?” “Doesn’t everyone just write like two drafts and publish?” I really didn’t know anything, but day by day I learned from other authors. I think I wrote twenty drafts before it was ready to be published.
Sense of humor: I had to laugh and laugh at myself. If not, I would have drowned from crying.
Ok, thank you for all that. Now let’s shift to the main focus of this interview. We would like to explore and flesh out the concept of becoming free from failure. Let’s zoom in a bit. From your experience, why exactly are people so afraid of failure? Why is failure so frightening to us?
Hmm, I think we all want approval. To be liked. Loved. If we are a failure, who would want us? So there’s that but also, I wonder if there’s a biological component. Survival. Like a thousand years ago, the person in the tribe that was not liked, got kicked out right? And so now they had to fend for themselves. When one was not part of a group, then it was less likely they would survive. So is that kind of survival instinct in us now? And then there’s worthiness. We put all our worth on someone else to decide. We give up our power when we do that. What would anyone else know about our worth anyway?
What are the downsides of being afraid of failure? How can it limit people?
Fear of failure is what keeps us from being all we can be. If we let the mind take over we’re toast. Don’t let it take over. Instead use it like an instrument. It’s really good for gathering info, calculating, etc. Go to the heart when you’re afraid, you’ll find more support there. Fear limits people from living out their dreams.
In contrast, can you help articulate a few ways how becoming free from the fear of failure can help improve our lives?
You know, I don’t know if I can ever be fully free of fearing failure. Fear will just suddenly pop up sometimes. That’s being human. It’s not that we need to get to a point where we never feel fear of failure ever again (that would be nice). I think it’s more like when it pops up we keep going anyway. Then you go from being afraid to being brave. And then the fear lessens every time you do it. The intensity is less and then you can function better. Get stuff done.
We would love to hear your story about your experience dealing with failure. Would you be able to share a story about that with us?
Sure which one of the million stories of me being a failure do you want? What can I say? It’s devastating, heartwrenching, and it makes you want to disappear. We’ve all felt it. We fail and we wish we could hit the undo button. I got my bachelors in television and film and it was very competitive to get into the program. They only gave you two tries. I failed the first time. I was so depressed but I had a choice. Give up? Try again?
How did you rebound and recover after that? What did you learn from this whole episode? What advice would you give to others based on that story?
It was so important for me that I just put everything I had into it and tried again and got into the program. It was the first time I felt I actually succeeded at anything. If you really, really believe in something, don’t stop. Get quiet. Really, really quiet and listen to your heart. What is it saying? If it really wants something, then don’t quit!
In your opinion, what are 5 steps that everyone can take to become free from the fear of failure”? Please share a story or an example for each.
- Keep your mind in check.
Do it regularly. Choose meditation, prayer, gardening, breathing, sports, or whatever works for you. It’s a challenge because I’d rather watch Netflix. But I realized keeping my mind in check is like brushing my teeth. Just because I brushed my teeth yesterday doesn’t mean I don’t need to brush them today. If I don’t tend to my mind regularly things tend to go a little haywire and that will remind me, oh yeah I better do a couple of sets of Wim Hof breathing, or meditate, or use EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) to reset.
2. Let the thoughts happen.
You’re not going to stop the mind from thinking, but you can quiet it. Don’t judge the thoughts. Instead of pushing them away, ask what part of you that thought is coming from. This is a technique that can take time to get better at. Most of the time I come across an inner child that needs or wants something. Validating and acknowledging the fear can be very freeing because then your mind understands that you are not ignoring it and it may quiet down.
3. Laugh.
Humor lightens heavy situations. Try to think of the situation as an absurd comedy, sitcom, or a cartoon.
4. Remember others are afraid of failing too.
Even the most amazing experts above all other experts have this fear. It’s just a choice. Be brave. Or let it control you.
5. Try, try again.
It’s just like that song from the artist, P!nk. “You gotta get up and try, try, try.”
The famous Greek philosopher Aristotle once said, “It is possible to fail in many ways…while to succeed is possible only in one way.” Based on your experience, have you found this quote to be true? What do you think Aristotle really meant?
Wow, what did he mean? I guess…I’m not sure. Maybe it’s like he’s saying you can fail many, many times, but once you succeed at something then that’s it. You’ve done it!
You are a person of great influence. If you could inspire a movement that would bring the most amount of good to the greatest amount of people, what would that be? You never know what your idea can trigger. 🙂
If I could inspire a movement? Oh gosh. What we need is empathy. People accepting people. Things will get better when people realize they need each other. Even when they are different in appearance, or the way they see things, or their beliefs. In the long run everyone needs everyone. I think that’s where the world is heading. We will all be forced to see that sooner or later.
We are blessed that some very prominent leaders read this column. Is there a person in the world, or in the US, with whom you would love to have a private breakfast or lunch, and why? He or she might just see this, especially if we tag them 🙂
Honestly? I’d love to have breakfast with a librarian who’s spent decades helping kids discover books. Librarians are the quiet heroes behind so many reading journeys, and I’d love to hear their stories and what kinds of books make kids light up.
How can our readers further follow your work online?
I just have my website www.joeisaacsasson.com. Anyone can drop me a line there if they want. 😉
This was very inspiring. Thank you so much for the time you spent on this. We wish you only continued success.
Published in Authority Magazine
In-depth Interviews with Authorities in Business, Pop Culture, Wellness, Social Impact, and Tech. We use interviews to draw out stories that are both empowering and actionable.Follow
Written by Savio P. Clemente
Journalist, Keynote & TEDx Speaker, Resilience Leadership Expert for High Performers, 2x Cancer Survivor, Board-Certified Wellness Coach, Best-Selling AuthorFollow